That title sounds awkward, definitely. I am sure you are eager to know what I have come up with this time, obviously. There is no denying that I cut the image of a wild thinker, the intellect of the wilderness, I suppose I am some sort of ‘John the Baptist’. You must imagine I am a pariah, the one who never fits in. Maybe you think I am scatterbrained idiot with no friends, maybe to you I am a gawky boy who girls ignore and I ruminate on my ‘loneliness and bitterness’. Maybe you think am an ape that eats dry leaves and nuts, a talking ape. I don’t know what you think of me, of course assuming that you think about me.
Without doubt, I am unusual. I think about things that many wouldn’t, I say things that I possibly shouldn’t and I do things that many couldn’t. I have always felt different; I have always been on my own path of ostensible solitude. I have always stood out from the rest, sort like a sore thumb. I have always been ‘special’ and noticeably so. I am not being sardonic or condescending, no, not now. I mean that I have always been an outlander. I have always been the ‘odd one out’. I have always been the one who talked too much or the one who said nothing at all. I have always been the awkward one, the one who was always a noisemaker, the one who always attracted unwarranted stares and always the one who made people laugh or got laughed at. Many people try to be different, but I have always wanted to be like everybody else. Many say I am unique but deep down I know it’s just another way of saying you are different, you are an outsider, an alien and “an extraterrestrial”
To many people, life is a straight line. To me it’s all spirals, always trying to find my place. I am always the coin among notes, the circle among squares, and the apple among bananas. I always feel as if my bus left, I think I was born in the wrong period and wrong place. I should have been born in the renaissance, maybe I would fit in as a hairless monk, and maybe I would an eccentric philosopher, who knows?
I try so hard to be normal. I try not to be the obvious misfit. I have tried sanity and I always fail. I have tried to be regular and it hasn’t worked. I try thinking straight and I always end up with convoluted thoughts. Sometimes I think my skull is full of intestines, every time I think I feel a tickling sensation… maybe my skull is full of termites, I always feel itchy inside my head, I try scratching I never reach it. Maybe that is God’s plan. I suppose God made me a misfit to demonstrate his cruel humour. I don’t know, I wish I could be like everybody else. If only I could be normal, even if it was just for ONE DAY.
3 comments:
Normal people are a great bore. What i do is just be myself and flaunt it and turns out the people around copy me. What i bet on is you feel alone coz you've not met anyone like you,chill out! we hit 7 billion just the other day and making a ratio of that to the personalities and traits people can have,i'm sure there are more people out there who think you're normal. "A worm in the middle of a sewage plant is prone to believe the whole universe is made of sewage" there's apoint in there somewhere but anyway keep up with the posts :)
Thank God you aren't normal...if you were, I would'nt be reading your unique posts.
let's see, different is good. i like different.i have also always felt odd but i look at it positively, i am the gem in the midst of stones.well, celebrate yourself for who you are.personally i do not like uniformity.i do not like being like everyone else.that's your personality and no God didn't do it to show His cruel humor.He is creative....
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